When you read a book and then see a movie, the cast rarely matches the mental image you had created.
Since each of our mind's are superior to Hollywood casting agents, the characters’ images never seem to exceed expectations, they’re usually let downs. And when this happens it usually ruins the movie, but the integrity of the book remains.
In social situations, this is a dangerous dynamic. I guess this is why they don’t have online dating services that operate without pictures. No matter how much looks don't matter to you, they still matter a lot. It takes less than a second for your brain to make the decision, and then when you get to know someone, your mind can do its best to alter that image.
I hadn’t thought about this until I got to dinner last night, and sat in front of someone that I knew only from periodic blog entries.
I’ll admit she was prettier than I had envisioned. She lacked the attention grabbing bar attributes that I assumed were a prerequisite for her risqué tales. Her gentle features didn’t match the often obscene things I’d read about her doing.
She was reading a book when I got there, just as I had intended to do if I had arrived when planned, but I would have been reading something that I would have hoped impressed the opposite party. She was reading a history book of sorts, so instead, I just felt old (I later found out she’s 2.92 years younger than me).
She had a glass of Chardonnay when I arrived, which I noted was quite classy, an adjective she said she strives for, but is rarely considered. I'm sure if she continues to date guys that she meets online, it will only occur more often.
We spoke comfortably, and she noted, to my delight, that I was much more confident in person than in my blog. She wasn't phased when I told her that I had met dozens of women online, and then a little surprised when I told her I was joking. She had a pension for pulling on both sides of her longish brown hair during conversation, as I arranged and rearranged my silverware in geometric patterns.
The conversation kept coming back to our blogs. Not so much content, but why we do it. She explained that she wanted to eventually write a book, and her current work would be a good foundation. And I confided that it makes my corporate existence slightly more palatable.
As things wrapped up, she said she was going to go to a bar down the street that night. I didn’t press for an invitation, I had a football game to watch, and I didn’t want to push my luck.
I’ll be surprised if she doesn’t say that it was a good date, but I’m anxiously awaiting her next entry. I think there is some type of holdout until i wrote my post-date entry. I think I'll have more to say after she blogs about it. My guess is the highlights will come from the night after we split up.